Category Archives: five minute friday

Ache – Five Minute Friday

Sometimes it’s just too much to bear.  Sometimes, this motherhood thing just feels like it’s all uphill and I just can’t take another step.  Sometimes, I don’t know what to do, how to respond, what is right.

Sometimes, I just ache.  I fall down on my knees, I want to give up, to run away, to let someone else handle it because I just can’t do it.

Sometimes it’s just too much to bear.  Sometimes, my heart is so full it is exploding out of my chest.  Sometimes, I look at my children and tears fall from my eyes, I just can’t help it.

Sometimes, I just ache.  I fall down on my knees and pull my children close to me.  I never want to leave that moment, I never want to be away from them, I never want to do anything else but just be their mom.

I experienced both today.  Toddler tantrums from Ezra, and then Eva brought me these sweet little notes.  She told me how she loves me and she just wants to be with me always.

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(After the timer: She wants to be a gardener when she grows up, and live in Estonia, and I can be a gardener and live with her there.  I absolutely love these little notes she gave me, how she sounded out every word and wrote it herself.  Later in the day, we were watching Toy Story 3 and at the very end after Andy gives all his toys away and drives off to college, Eva said: “this music is just so sad, it’s making me want to cry!”  I looked at her and she was crying.  I pulled her close to me and hugged her and she choked on her tears, and she said, “The music is just so sad, and when I grow up I don’t ever want to be away from you!”)

I’m linking up at The Gypsy Mama.

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Bird-Like Faith – Five Minute Friday – Trust

        1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
        2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
        3. Please visit the person who linked up before you & encourage them.
    TRUST.

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GO —

We agreed. We sat on the bed and we agreed that our lives, our whole lives would be “yes”. We had been committed to our faith for 6 months and we decided that we would always say yes to God, no matter where He wanted to take us. It’s pretty glamorous at the time, and exciting to think about where God might take us in our lives. We were young and in love, with each other and with our creator.

Sorrow may last for the night, but joy comes in the morning. Singing, yes Lord, yes Lord, yes, yes Lord.

At times, it has taken great faith to trust in God. To believe that He knows what He’s doing. But so far, He has never failed us.

I think of the verse in Matthew 6 where Jesus talks about the lilies of the field and the birds of the air. He tells us not to worry. I close my eyes and imagine myself as a lily in the field, blown this way and that by the wind, but trusting in my creator. I imagine myself as a bird, gracefully flying through the air. I have no where to store food, but the Lord always feeds me.

— STOP

I’m linking up with The Gypsy Mama

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Real – Five Minute Friday

The Gypsy Mama encourages us to write for five minutes flat, no editing, no over-thinking, no back tracking — to write without worrying. I finally decided to give it a try. This Friday’s topic was: real.

GO —

We were all just trying to be something — to be someone. We walked around in other people’s clothes and tried on their ideals. I kept looking for the rules, the right way to be. I kept trying to figure out how to measure up.

Nothing ever quite felt right.

It wasn’t until that summer, that one summer I spent alone in the french province. I knew there had to be something more. I spent every night spilling words into my journal. Seeking and searching. Tiny little prayers, before I even knew what praying was.

Six months later, I met him. He whispered a secret into my heart and I started to learn, I started to know who I really was.

Forgiven and free, no longer searching for the rules. The rules didn’t apply anymore — only grace, abundant grace. Grace that revealed the real me.

— STOP

“It’s in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living…” – Ephesians 1:11 MSG

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Filed under five minute friday, Posts by Chelsey